Fuck you, this is MY body.

My sister told me this quote the other day. I keep feeling like the world has come along and snatched my rose-colored glasses then smashed them while laughing in my face. Things and people who I thought were awesome and great turn out to be horrible and bad. It’s depressing and I want my fucking glasses back! I guess I just have to adjust to this new world or make a stand to focus only on the positive things. Why does that feel like it takes much more energy than usual? Oh right I’m depressed. jkldmvc!! whatever I am fighting through this. THE FUCKED UP WORLD WON’T GET ME. At least not without a fight or anything I can muster from my soul.

and I plan to.

Exactly how I have been feeling lately.

I am picking up my sword today. I am exhausted. I barely slept. I have a lot to do but I am taking small steps to get to where I need to be. Some days I feel energized so I do as much as I can while I feel that way. Then when the days I feel like I can’t even get out of bed roll around I can feel not as horrible. I find that if I can have something to look forward to, a goal of some sort, I can get through the day better. My goal today is to get my 6 page paper, in-class assignments (I couldn’t get to class) and study guide done so I can help my mom decorate for Christmas and enjoy that I am one more class down to graduate.

Things are getting pretty serious. (I am aware of how not uplifting my last few posts have been ha. Kip is hilarious and my antidote)

I am trying to do this today. It is so intimidating but I know it is the only way I will feel better. Even if we just tackled one problem or a little bit of the problem everyday we would feel so much better. Let’s do this!